Honorato Floro

my Father,
and I love him dearly

is annoying me right now

for the past months now

I know he means well
and I am grateful
for everything
EVERYTHING

but we are two very
very, very different
species of person

at the crack of dawn
hardworking man that he is
he gets up
to be the first employee at the office

at the crack of dawn
I am wide eyed
sitting in front of a monitor

I think,
on some unconscious level
he resents me for this

me, no one asked me
but I feel
intruded on
a figure moving around this time of the day
when the world should be dead to me

all the asking, asking, asking me
it is pesky

always, ALWAYS
you mean well, I KNOW

but you do not ask to know
you are not particularly listening
do not really understand

and that is not your fault.

My world is far removed from yours

I need some breathing space.

And I thank you
for all that you have done for me
for being there-here-now
the sacrifices
the genrousity
the patience
I really am thankful
sincerely, eyes burning, tear-threatening
to fall
Thankful

but I am in dire need of some distance
away from you.

I am no longer a child.
Have you noticed perhaps?

and though
I may
am thoroughly enjoying
all the perks
of being your child

maybe I ought to grow the fuck up
let the tradeoffs
the comforts
go
in exchange for my
being an adult.

and you
ought to let me go, too.
and try not to resent me for it.

I am sorry it is taking me too long
to find my wings.